Resolving Resentment

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I pointed out recently, in an article titled Marriage Big Issues, that resentment is a real danger in our relationships. (The link to Marriage Big Issues is at the end of this article)

To assist those who are struggling with resentments or other issues in their marriage or relationships I want you to see the key to resolving resentments and dissolving many of the issues and problems that can destroy relationships.

One of my granddaughters, just eight years old, told me today that she prays about her tendency to get angry and now has greater control over her anger.  Last night I saw her quietly leave the table after something upset her and she came back a short while later in a perfectly happy mood.  She had prayed about the feelings she was struggling with.

So the keys to resolving resentments and related upsets are not hard to access.  Even a child can apply God’s truth to become free.

Power Tool

Back in the 1980’s I taught a marriage series in which I included a session on the Marriage Power Tool.  Susan and I had proven the power of this key on several occasions and so I could confidently teach and recommend it.  That ‘power tool’ is the key to Resolving Resentments which I am sharing here.

God’s Power Tool for repairing relationships is FORGIVENESS.

It may not sound impressive or catchy, and it may even be something you most want to avoid, but it is the wonderful and simple key to unlocking hurts, resentments, pain and hopelessness in many relationships.

Forgive the Offender

Jesus gave extensive teaching about our need to forgive.  In the famous Sermon on the Mount, Jesus included the words, “Forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors” (Matthew 6:12).  Then Jesus immediately followed the prayer with a challenging instruction.

“For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” Matthew 6:14,15

Forgive or else!  If you refuse to forgive then you won’t be forgiven.  It’s as simple as that.

To nail the message home Jesus later told a parable about a king who forgave a servant who owed a great debt.  That forgiven servant went off and threatened someone who owed the servant a small debt.  Because the servant refused to pass on the grace of forgiveness, the king threw the servant into prison, demanding that the whole debt be paid in full.

Because the servant would not forgive he was not forgiven.  See Matthew 18:23-35 for the record of this parable.

And to make the matter all the more relevant to us, Jesus ended the parable by saying that God will treat each of us that same way.

“And his lord was wroth, and delivered him to the tormentors, till he should pay all that was due to him.  So likewise will my heavenly Father do also to you, if you from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses.” Matthew 18:34,35

Resentment Resists

What makes Forgiveness so very important when people argue or are upset with each other is that our human heart is drawn toward resentment, rather than forgiveness.  Rather than forgive the offender, our selfish human heart gets upset, hurt and resentful.  So making the choice to forgive is a very powerful thing to do.  It defies the natural instinct of our selfish human heart and enables us to release God’s grace.

When we are upset with others we become ungracious toward them.  Our words and attitudes tend toward despisement and resentment.

Common responses people make toward each other betray the edge of resentment, rebuke and cynicism that are in place.  “So you finally decided to turn up, did you?”  “It’s about time you decided to help.”  “I do hope it’s not too much trouble for you to make yourself useful.”  “I suppose you think it was MY fault.”

All of these jibes shout our resentment and our failure to bring God’s grace into the situation.

Practical Examples

A wife may be resentful of her husband who seems keener to be at work or out of the home than to meet the practical needs of the family.  Similarly a husband may resent his wife who would rather talk with her friends than be there for him.

When a wife or husband is agitated by resentments they will speak them into the relationship, even if trying not to.  A wife calling her husband to urge him home will tend to display in her tone and her words that she is disappointed and accusing of her husband for not being home yet.  A husband trying to make comment about something he wants his wife to change will invariably bring disappointment and accusation into his tone and words.

However, if the husband and wife have fully resolved their resentments they can address the issues without bringing their resentments into the equation.

“Hi honey, are you getting home soon?  We’re waiting to eat together and so I’m hoping you can join us.”

“Sweetheart, can I get you to end that phone call so we can have a little catch up time before dinner?”

What do you resent?

There are many things that can be resented in relationships but the common ones will centre on food, time, intimacy, laziness, control and similar core issues.

When resentment enters the picture it is very easy for ungracious words and heated exchanges to erupt.

“Of course you liked the meal.  It’s full of fat.  When are you going to do something about your weight?”

“Why do I have to do it right now?  We have plenty of time to do that, but not much time for just being together.”

“I knew you’d be thinking about intimacy, but what about all those chores that haven’t been done?”

If you could identify the things you resent, and then ask God to help you forgive the other party for the failings and hurts that you attach to those resentments, then you can begin removing the barriers to your relationship.

Powertool

Susan and I have found over the years that some rather tough moments have been turned around in an instant, just by one or the other facing the resentments and choosing forgiveness instead of the selfish choice.

That doesn’t mean it is easy.  We have both faced times of struggle in coming to the place where we would give open hearted forgiveness to the other.

For us the issues have not been great dramatic reasons to resent the other, but the personal disappointments and frustrations that come with living life alongside someone who has a different approach or value system about some things than we do.

We have found forgiveness to be an absolute powertool for ourselves and for those who will accept it.  But it has to be activated.  Just like a machine that has to be switched on, forgiveness takes an active choice to activate it.

Everything Can Be Forgiven

I know that people are jealous about their hurts.  We are all likely to think, “Well you just don’t understand what I am going through”.  We want to have a right to hold resentment and bitterness in our heart.  We want vengeance and we want the other person to admit they are wrong and change their ways before we will give them forgiveness.

Be assured that all can be forgiven.  Adultery can be forgiven.  Incest can be forgiven.  Violence can be forgiven.  Betrayal can be forgiven.  I have helped people address these very issues and find forgiveness where they thought it was impossible.  Everything can be forgiven.

And that means that everything is fixable.  There is no ultimate sin against you or your marriage that gives you the right to put an end to the relationship.  Only God can end your marriage, since He is the one who joined you as one flesh in the moral miracle of marriage.

Jesus Christ was murdered by men who hated Him without a cause, supported by the very people He came to save.  And on His deathbed, Jesus said, “Father forgiven them”.

Everything can be forgiven.

Get God’s Grace

Giving forgiveness is a divine act.  It puts you into God’s territory.  In fact, the Bible calls forgiveness “the grace of God”.

The Bible tells us to be very careful to show God’s grace or a root of bitterness, which we like to call resentment or some other soft label, will spring up and pollute and destroy.

“Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled” Hebrews 12:15

If you can’t forgive then you need to encounter God’s grace.  It is hard to give away something you have never received.

You are a rotten selfish sinner and you are worthy of nothing but God’s judgment.  But God sent Jesus to die to pay your penalty for you.  If you accept Christ as your saviour you receive God’s grace.  Then you can start to give that grace away to others, by forgiving them, just as God has forgiven you.
Find the Marriage Big Issues article at http://chrisfieldblog.com/2011/12/22/marriage-big-issues

Marriage Big Issues

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I recently read a book by Joel and Kathy Davisson, Man of Her Dreams, in which they address a tendency by some men to make the wife’s “submission” a key issue in marriage.

As they see it, Biblical marriage teaching popularised in the 1980’s ended up making “submission” the key issue in Christian marriages, leading to various ways in which wives have suffered. To bring redress they seek to wind back the significance of a wife’s submission and call upon men to lay down their lives for the wife.

It seems that the 1980’s teaching promised that if a wife submitted, the marriage would be wonderful. So the Davisson’s replace that erroneous idea with the proposition that if a husband submits to the vision of the marriage as directed by his wife, then they will live happily ever after.

Joel and Kathy’s book prompted me to consider how I would address imbalanced thinking about the Biblical issues for husband and wife.

Mind Your Own Business

The readily identifiable responsibilities for husband and wife as given in the Bible are clearly that the husband must “love” his wife and the wife must “submit” to her husband.

Now obviously wives are to love their husband and husbands give attention to and work alongside their wives. Mutual affection and submission are obviously ideal in a good working marriage relationship. However, the clear directive is that the husband give supreme attention to loving his wife and the wife give supreme attention to submitting to her husband.

But take note that the clear instructions to love and submit are clearly addressed to the responsible party, not their spouse. Husbands are not instructed to enforce submission, nor the wife instructed to force her husband to love her. Each is individually accountable before God for their actions.

So, husbands and wives, “Mind Your Own Business!”

Marriage is not a battleground where you struggle to get your spouse to do their part. It is a place where you live in the fear of God and be the man or woman God has called you to be, through all the “for better or for worse” challenges.

Dear Husband Dear Wife

Let me show you, in your face, so you can’t miss it, that the instructions for a husband and wife are given to the relevant party. It is NOT your place to be an enforcement officer in your marriage, or anyone else’s.

Ephesians 5 is the most extensive Bible passage addressing the responsibilities of a husband and wife. Here we see the love/submit responsibilities stated repeatedly and expanded with reference to Christ and the Church. Yet at no point is anyone authorised to police the responsibilities, except the individual husband and wife taking responsibility for their own actions.

“Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands, as to the Lord.” Ephesians 5:22

“Therefore as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.” Ephesians 5:24

“Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it” Ephesians 5:25

“So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loves his wife loves himself.” Ephesians 5:28

“Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.” Ephesians 5:33

Note that the last verse does not say, “Husbands see that your wife reverences you”.

The Focus on You

When Paul repeats to the church he planted in Colosse the personal responsibilities of husband and wife he goes on to show that these are personal responsibilities before God. The point is, therefore, that we are not accountable to our spouse, but to God. And our spouse is not accountable to us, but to God.

In Colossians 3:18-25 Paul addresses wives, husbands, children, fathers and servants in a common instruction regarding their personal challenges.

“Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord.

Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing to the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged. Servants, obey in all things your masters according to the flesh; not with eyeservice, as menpleasers; but in singleness of heart, fearing God:

And whatsoever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not to men;

Knowing that of the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance: for you serve the Lord Christ. But he that does wrong will receive for the wrong which he has done: and there is no respect of persons.”

Note that the Lord will reward those who do right and will see that wrong actions receive due response, because all we do, as wife, husband, child, father or servant, is really done in service of Christ our Lord.

Beware the Human Heart

Marriage issues in western Christian homes are rarely about the husband or the wife not knowing their role and responsibility. The problems spring from the selfish evil human heart we all carry within us.

Men fail to love their wife. They do so often because of laziness and selfishness. They also do so because of resentment toward the wife.

Women fail to submit to their husband. They do so because of such things as self interest, self will and resentment.

God is watching our heart and will reward us according to how our heart responds to the various challenges that come our way, including the challenges that come from our marriage and family.

“I the LORD search the heart, I try the reins, to give every man according to his ways, and according to the fruit of his doings.” Jeremiah 17:10

Always Show Grace

The most common issue in marriage is that husband, wife or both have given up giving grace to each other. We all know that when we are in a good mood we suffer all manner of frustrations, but when we are troubled by ill will toward our spouse we find it impossible to show grace.

Human selfishness is counter to God’s grace. We are sinful but God is perfect. We are instructed by Christ to show God’s grace so we too may be perfect.

“Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; So you may be the children of your Father in heaven: for he makes his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and unjust.” Matthew 5:44,45

“Be perfect, even as your Father in heaven is perfect.” Matthew 5:48

However our human heart rebels against blessing those who we feel have wronged us. And that is toxic to a marriage.

Enter Resentment

Newlyweds find many things to resent in their newfound spouse. We enter marriage with hopes, dreams, delusions, false ideas about ourself and our spouse, fears, insecurities, unrealistic expectations, and so on. It is a recipe for hurts and disillusionment.

But in the honeymoon phase we tend to press past these bumps and show grace, in the hope that we can get our spouse to change, or in a trade-off for the benefits which marriage provides.

Eventually, however, our selfish hearts give up on grace and we give in to our selfish feelings. Not everyone pouts, seethes or revolts, but the tiny roots of disappointment, resentment, hurt, frustration, disillusionment and the like begin to sprout in our hearts.

What I call “resentment” is the soft term for “bitterness”. But westerners don’t like to be told they have such ugly things in their heart, so they will more likely accept the softer label of resentment, since resentment suggests we have a right to be resentful based on the failure or actions of the other party.

Enter Bitterness

Having softened you up with the ‘R’ word (resentment), let me switch it for the ‘B’ word, Bitterness.

The writer to the Hebrews warns us clearly that if we fail to show grace the alternative is BITTERNESS. Call it by any other name if you like, but if you are feeling hard feelings toward your spouse you are in bitterness! Sorry about that, but it’s actually YOUR FAULT. You are in deep trouble because your heart has rejected God’s grace and given in to the powerfully destructive bitterness plant growing in your heart.

See it for yourself in the book of Hebrews….

“Follow peace with all men, and holiness, without which no man shall see the Lord: Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled; Lest there be any fornicator, or profane person, as Esau, who for one morsel of meat sold his birthright.” Hebrews 12:14-16

Let me paraphrase the message for you…

‘Live by peace and holiness, or you will never see the Lord. And be really careful about always giving God’s grace to people, because if you don’t a “root of bitterness” will spring up and trouble you and poison many people. And don’t commit spiritual adultery by putting other things ahead of your spiritual inheritance, like Esau did, selling his birthright for self indulgence.’

Be Not Bitter

Your selfish heart will readily enter into resentment (bitterness) and will justify those feelings based on the failure of your spouse.

Wives and Husbands will feel hurt, frustration, disappointment, shame, offence, defeat, death of their vision for the marriage, and all sorts of related feelings. Those feelings could easily feed feelings of self-pity, defeatism and depression. Those feelings make psychologists busy and profitable.

But God’s will is that we do not give in to those various expressions of bitterness. We are to show grace, like God does, and not fail to keep giving our best to those who don’t deserve it, just as God gives sunshine and rain equally to the good and the evil.

No matter what our spouse puts us through God is watching our heart to see how we react. He wants us to react in a perfect expression of His grace. Our flesh wants to react with anger, manipulation, retaliation, indulging our hurt feelings, and so on.

Note Paul’s specific word to husbands in Colossians …..

“Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.” Colossians 3:19

The Big Issue is the Heart

The big issue in marriage is not the wife’s submission. And it is not the perfection of the husband’s love for his wife. The whole trouble with marriage is the resentment and bitterness that springs up in the human heart, producing hardness toward the spouse and justifying those bitter thoughts and the resultant actions they produce.

What comes out the husband’s heart and what comes out of the wife’s heart are the “issues of life” for that couple. Well, it is actually the issue for the individual, since the spouse does not really get affected.

Ooops! Did I hear a reaction to that statement?

Remember that you are in control of your heart. Your rebellious wife or your uncaring husband are not your issue. They are each accountable before God for their rebellion against God’s will for their lives. All that is important for you is that you show grace to them.

If you fail to show grace, then your heart reaction will become a serious issue in your marriage. What comes out of your heart determines the issues of your life and marriage.

“Keep your heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.” Proverbs 4:23

“All these evil things come from within, and defile the man.” Mark 7:23

Hidden Man of the Heart

The Bible reveals we have a hidden personality in our heart. It is our most private part.

Peter encourages women to let the beauty of their hidden inner heart attitudes of submission be more important to them than dressing up with clothes and hairdo.

“Likewise, wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the lifestyle of the wives; While they behold your chaste lifestyle coupled with fear. Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.” 1Peter 3:1-4

Your wife is married to your hidden man of the heart. Your husband is married to your hidden inner man.

Is your hidden man of the heart one with a meek and quiet spirit? Does it live by the fear of God? Or is it defiled with seething self interest, selfishness, pouting, resentment, bitterness, and such like?

The Problem with Your Marriage

The problem with your marriage is your heart. It is not your wife’s lack of submission or your husband’s insensitivity.

God has set you up with a spouse that will constantly fail you and test your heart. As far as you are concerned, God is focussed on your heart reaction, not your spouse’s selfishness. It is up to God to deal with your spouse. Their willingness or unwillingness to be the husband or wife they are supposed to be is a matter of God’s judgment on their life. You have no stake in the matter.

You have a huge stake in your heart reaction. And you have a HUGE stake in the question of your resentment or bitterness toward your spouse.

So, get over the fact that your wife is a tyrant and your husband is a jerk. Get serious about your heart response. That’s the only thing you have to care about.

Rapped in Love – A Christmas Poem

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I be-lieve in the Baby in the Manger
I be-lieve he was no Stranger
To the people who are bad and the things that make us sad
Coz He came to Set us FREE.

Please believe in the Heavenly Save-ya
Please receive all the things that he gave ya
Coz real happy you will be, when you let him set you free
From the things you hide like the garbage inside
Which you carry from the start, as evil in your heart
Coz He came to set you free.

So at this time of tinsel and toys
We want you to remember the joys
That Jesus gives, to everyone that Lives
In this wonderful world God made.

Well it’s Christmas Time, so this little Rhyme
Will tell the tale of an itty bitty male
Born behind an Inn for a World of sin
So let the Story Being!

It all began Thousands of Years Ago
Just like the Bible Tells us so
When the world got distracted
And the mess was protracted
And nobody seemed to know.

All the people were so Proud
With opinions oh so loud
That they couldn’t hear the sound of the pain all around
Coz their eyes were covered with a shroud.

Well God above, Filled with holy love
Saw this mankind mess and decided to bless
All the people in need, like those filled with greed
So God’s holy plan was laid, coz the price had to be paid.

Now if you owed a Debt, or you stole or lost a bet
There’d be hell to pay, And they’d chase you all the way
Unless someone came along, who had never done wrong
And decided to be nice, and Pay off the Price.

That was God’s Deal, and the plan was real
But there was no one, ‘cept God’s only holy Son
Who could live without sin, with no garbage within
And could pay that ugly price, and not have to do it twice.

So God said, “Son, You are the One”
And I’m sending you to earth, to go through human birth
And grow up a holy man, who’ll fulfil my holy plan.
But I say with a sigh, In the end you’ll have to die.”

Jesus knew the Father’s love, coz he lived with Him above
And He knew he had to do, this plan and see it through
So he willingly said “Yes”, and so, you’ll never guess
He became a babe on earth, waiting for his birth.

Then on the perfect day, as his mother rode her way
To Bethlehem where they were gonna stay
It came the time for birth, so here upon the earth
The Son of God in a manger lay.

You see the inn was full and the best that they could pull
Was to shelter in the stable with the cows
So that’s where he was born, and on that very morn
He cradled in their trough for hours and hours.

And the Shepherds on a hill resting cold and still
Heard the sound of angel voices in the air
And they nearly died of fright to see such awesome sight
Which at any time has been so strange and rare.

The angel said, Don’t fear, but rather give a cheer
For I bring you news that’s wonderful and grand.
A saviour has been born, this very early morn
And he will bring God’s blessing to the land.

A babe is born today who has come to change the way
All the people live their lives and get set free
So go down into town and have a look around
A King is born and you’ll be first to see.”

What an awesome joy it was when they found the babe becoz,
It was just the way the angels said would be
So they bowed the knee and blessed the one who gives us rest
For the gift God gave to set the people free.

And that’s not all that came, for some men of pomp and fame
From a distant land came all the way to find
The baby born as King, who made the angels sing,
Who would heal the sick and give sight to the blind.

They brought their gifts and gold and to the king they told
How a star had led them from their distant land
And they came to find the child, tender still and mild
To bless him with the gifts they had in hand.

So that’s how God’s plan got started
And that’s how we got parted
From our sin and shame, coz when Jesus came
He paid the price for those things that aren’t nice
Which trapped us in pain, again and again
And forgave us so we can be Free.

I be-lieve in the Baby in the Manger
I be-lieve he was no Stranger
To the people who are bad and the things that make us sad
Coz He came to Set us FREE.

Please believe in the Heavenly Save-ya
Please receive all the things that he gave ya
Coz real happy you will be, when you let him set you free
From the things you hide like the garbage inside
Which you carry from the start, as evil in your heart
And He gives you His Joys, Which are better than the toys
Coz He came to set you free.

So at this time of tinsel and toys
We want you to remember the joys
That Jesus gives, to everyone that Lives
In this wonderful world God made.

Your Character House

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Son, today I begin teaching you how to build a house.  I will teach you how to choose the timber, how to cut it and work it and how to join it so well you create a strong and lovely structure, fit for your future bride and a happy family.

It will take me years to teach you all I know, and you will learn by working alongside me, assisting me, observing what I do and listening to my instructions.

In time, you will have all the skills you need to build a fine house for the young bride of your choosing.  And, you will remodel and expand it over time, for your growing family.

With the skills I shall teach, you will be able to rebuild the whole thing if ever a disaster should destroy it or sweep it away.

Shoddy Building

You have seen the gaps in the walls and the leaks in the roof at Jake’s place.  You have seen the problems at the Garrard’s place.  Those families are cold in winter, wet in the rain, unhappy in the heat and uncomfortable most of the time.

When a house is built badly the whole family suffers.  The builder can take an easy day or get a quick fix to a problem, but the consequences will impact others and last for years to come.

I will teach you to build carefully and well.  It will take more time and it will be physically harder than a hasty job.  If you don’t do it right, you, your lovely bride and your children will live with the results of selfishness and laziness for many years to come.

I want your children to be proud of you and pleased with you.  I want them to honour you.  But first you must decide to honour them, even though you don’t know them yet, by making the right choices now.

Character

And son, the same is true of the invisible house you live in.  Every day you are building your character house.  If you build well your future will be blessed.  If you build a poor and shoddy structure, you will live with the consequences for the rest of your life.

Every day you face choices about obedience, diligence, truthfulness, repect, patience, self-sacrifice, and a host of other character issues.  When you choose wisely and stick with those choices over the weeks and years, you build a solid wall or a sturdy frame in your character house.

In years to come that sturdy character house will give you strength under trial, protection in hardship, honour from others, security for the future and peace in times of storm.

Tearing Down your House

Every time you choose to lie, be selfish, resent others, give in to anger or jealousy, speak sharply, react, steal, reject the truth, or any other thing that is against godly character, you tear timbers from your character house.

You will create gaping holes in the walls, leaks in the roof, uneven beams, teetering frame and other major problems in your house.

And, what is worse, you can never leave that house.  You take it with you wherever you go.  You take it into your future, into your marriage, into your family, into your career and into everything else you do.

You will suffer cold drafts of fear, the dampness of doubt, the aches of regret, the shame of your shoddy work and the pain of defeat.  You will feel the cramped limitations of your laziness and the smallness of the world you have built for yourself and your family.

Character Pain

You have seen how the Magrans argue, even in public.  You have seen how Rordan’s children run from his anger.  You have seen sadness in old Mrs Gray’s eyes.

People you know are trapped in painful houses they built for themselves.  They live with disappointment, limitation, agitation, loneliness, false accusations, loss of self control, foolishness, vain ideas, and so much more.

Each of them built those unhappy places for themselves.  They each now live with the hasty, selfish choices they made years ago.

Don’t be like them.

Choose Wisely

Anyone can shelter under a pile of sticks.  But no one wants to live there.  Gracious rooms filled with lovely things, are not found in a pile or rubble.  It takes time and effort to create such a home.

And while you build a family home with your hands, you build your character house with your heart.  You build it by choices.  They are often hard choices.  You build by each choice to do right and to silence the selfish, lustful and evil thoughts that lurk in your heart.

So choose wisely, my son.  Build well.  And let me guide your hands and your heart as we work together on the wonderful future God has for you.

To The Slaves

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Be warned, my fellow Westerners, living in the luxury of modern life and enjoying democratic government and the notion of wonderful freedom.  You are slaves.  You have been cunningly enslaved by those you trusted to protect you.  So I write this summary to expose your situation so you can decide what you will do about your enslavement.

Your Lost Freedoms

You were born with God-given freedoms and rights, known as inalienable rights because they cannot ever be separated from who and what you are.

Those rights and freedoms have been defined from ancient time and you find them in the Holy Bible, in ancient English common law, in the Imperial Acts of the monarchs of England, in the Coronation Oath of the British monarchs, in the Bill of Rights 1688 and in the Constitutions that establish nations.

Simply stated, in western democracies, the men and women of the society pool their personal sovereignty to form government for their society.  They are sovereign and their will is supreme over their own lives.

They elect “representatives” to stand in proxy for the sovereign men and women and to serve the will of those men and women.  That is why elected officials and those they appoint are known as “public servants”.  They are to serve the will of the public.

We are not slaves to the will of the Emperor, or the will of the government, or the will of anyone else.  We are the sovereigns and we participate in society by our individual choice to do so.  We are governed only so far as we agree to be governed, and we may withdraw our agreement at any time, because we are the sovereigns.  Any other model makes us SLAVES to the will of others who are denying us our God-given inalienable rights and freedoms.

You are either a sovereign or you are a slave.  You either have the right and power to live your life or you don’t.  If you don’t, then you are not free, but you are enslaved.

Moral Responsibility

Note, however, that our personal rights and freedoms do not extend to committing crimes.  We are each morally responsible before God, from whom we draw our rights and freedoms.

The simple summary of our moral responsibilities toward our fellow man is that we must not harm anyone or their property, and we must keep our word to them.  The Bible summarised our responsibility toward our fellow man as “Love your neighbour as yourself”, and Jesus Christ summarised it as “Do to others what you want them to do to you”.

We are not free to abuse, steal, lie, cheat, harm or otherwise impose upon others.

Mankind is responsible before God to hold each other accountable for crimes against person and property and for keeping our word.

Freedom Today

Our real standing is that we are each a personal sovereign whose will is meant to be represented in the social decision making process of government.  Governments are created by us and for us, so all expressions of the government, including all the various departments, officials, processes, etc, are there as our public servants.  Compare that with what takes place today.

A cold look at what happens today suggests that our elected representatives and the appointed officials do not see themselves as there to serve us at all.  Instead they serve corporate agendas, money making for the government or corporation, and other objectives which not only ignore our wishes but impose things on us against our will.  Even those who are diligent about their position and responsibilities end up only serving the tasks assigned them in their role, which tasks are essentially designed for the good of that corporation, not delivery of the underlying rights and freedoms of the sovereign people.

Even where the majority of the public clearly oppose certain decisions the politicians will pass something into law and force it on the people.  This is not ‘representative government’ or ‘democracy’.  It is enslavement.  You are made a slave every time your elected government or some government department or corporation takes action against the public will.

Are You a Slave or Are you Free?

In view of what I have just outlined, are you a slave or are you free?

Do your elected representatives ask you for your instructions and then do what you tell them?

Do the government departments and officials listen to your instructions or complaints and then serve you effectively?

Or does the government push its own agendas?

Do governments pass laws that the people object to and then force compliance from the general public?

Have your rights and freedoms expanded over the past decades or have they been eroded?

More Serious Questions

Since your true rights and freedoms have been defined for hundreds of years, we can measure whether you are a slave or free based on how today’s government and society measures up against the ancient benchmarks.

A well known ancient benchmark defining personal freedom is found in Magna Carta which was first prescribed in 1215 and then reiterated in 1297.

The first version of Magna Carta in 1215 included this promise: “To no one will we sell, to no one deny or delay right or justice.”  That Promise was repeated in Magna Carta 1297 as “We will sell to no man, we will not deny or defer to any man either Justice or Right.”

So the evidence of a free society is that every member of the society is guaranteed justice and their rights.  In fact the delivery of justice and their rights will never be denied and will not even be delayed.

Are justice and people’s rights speedily delivered to all in your society?

I set up the website http://Justice-and-Right.com to give focus to this most basic foundation of our rights and freedoms.  You will find various articles there discussing related matters.

Modern Government

In practice today’s western governments provide the impression of representing the democratic will of the people, but actually have their own agendas in mind.  Those governments have no regard for Magna Carta and the rights and freedoms of the people, except to keep up appearances and appease the people.

Western governments are increasingly intent on making their constituents slaves to debts incurred by those governments.  And it is likely that most governments are bound to serve masters apart from the people who elected them, such as international financiers and international power brokers.

The net result of this is that you are a slave.  You are being pushed around and expoited by the very government you might be proud of and have voted for.  That government and all the officials are far less interested in your will than their own.  They do not seek to ‘represent’ you, but to enslave you.

Sold Out

You have been progressively sold out by those who were entrusted with authority by you.  They can’t admit they have done this and they keep up appearances of all being in order as it has always been.

Your elected officials and those appointed to responsibility have sold you out for personal gain, or for ideological motivations, or because of secret agreements and bonds they are party to, or to feather their own nest in some way or similar reasons.

Just as spies are moved by various motivations to use their position against the country they live in, your leaders over past generations and today have progressively sold out your rights and freedoms for their own reasons.

However it happened, your sovereignty has been subverted, your freedoms removed, your rights destroyed and justice denied you and you have been made into a slave.

Try Bucking the System

If you still doubt that you are a slave then try bucking the system.  Just try calling your elected representatives to account, challenging some government rule that offends you and your rights, or calling for justice and your rights.

You will not get what you ask for.  Your sovereign will is ignored.  That is because your sovereignty has been subverted and sold out.  Your will is no longer represented by those you elect, but ignored and suberted by them.  They think this is the way it is supposed to be.

Ignoring the Slaves

Because you are a slave the social system of politicians, officials, courts and corporations will ignore you.  It will initially do so politely, so as not to arouse your suspicion about your enslavement, but you will get nowhere trying to have your voice heard.

If you press the point you will get various forms of polite obfuscation.  Rather than address your concerns as a sovereign man or woman calling your representatives or public servants to account, those in positions of authority will fob you off in various ways.

If you phone them you will get passed from person to person.  If you write, you might get a polite reply from an underling advising that the person or department you are calling into question is doing exactly what it is supposed to do according to such and such a law or Act of government.

If you press the point harder you will be ignored, or told you are a trouble maker, or given a fresh justification for the actions you object to from someone higher up the tree.

However they respond the net result is that you are left without the answer or outcome you sought according to your will.  Your WILL, the most significant element of your freedom, is ignored and trampled upon, albeit politely.  And that is because you are a slave.  Your slave masters don’t need to obey the will of a slave.

Doing My Job

One of the answers you will get when you challenge the system is a reply from someone saying in effect, “I am just doing my job”.  They will advise you that according to such and such a rule, or regulation, or the like, they are supposed to do what they are doing.

If you challenge them and point out that by them “doing their job” they are violating your rights, denying you justice, making you a slave, or the like, they will shrug their shoulders and try to get away from responsibility by saying, “I’m just doing my job”, “This is what I am supposed to do”, “I have a wife and kids to support, so don’t blame me if you don’t like it.  I’m just doing what I have to do.  You’d do the same in my place.”

Everyone Is Accountable

The stand that “it’s out of my control and I’m just doing my small part” quickly fails close scrutiny.

A man who drives the getaway car for a bank robbery, or who locks someone in a room so another person can attack them is an Accomplice.  They are fully accountable for their actions and responsible for their part in the abuse that takes place.  They are an undisputed party to the crime.

In the same way every official, in politics, courts, government departments, corporations, or the like who contributes to the abuse of your rights, justice and freedoms is an Accomplice.  They are an undisputed party to crimes against humanity and to your enslavement.

They are all fully accountable, even if a politician has promised them protection by passing laws to protect them.  Abuse is abuse, violence is violence and enslavement is enslavement, no matter what supposed laws are in place to protect those who commit the crimes.

What to Do

Do you know what to do about your enslavement?

If you don’t know what to do then you are in a pretty sorry situation.  You are a slave and you don’t know how to change it.  What hope is there for you and your children?

You will notice that the freedoms enjoyed just a few decades ago have been reduced since then.  Your freedoms are not being expanded, but eroded.  You are increasingly enslaved with each passing year.

So what will things be like in another fifty years?  What are you leaving for your children and grandchildren to live under?  What are you going to do to protect their freedoms and ensure they are not even more enslaved than you are?

Each of us must answer such questions for ourselves.  These are personal matters.  You may want to be a slave and want your descendents trapped in slavery.  You might have decided that this is the way it is meant to be.  It is not up to me to tell you how to live your life.  What you leave for your children is your business.

However, what I think is wise is that we stand up for what is ours and what belongs to our descendents.  I would like to see many of us effectively call to account those involved in injustice, treason and slavery.  I pray that at least some of you sense the same convictions.